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Have a Happy New Year!

Here we are at the beginning of a new year. Here you are planning a wedding that can be the basis for your shared life from here on out. People have such mixed ideas about new year’s resolutions. I’m not excited about the lists of things that you hate about yourself and are therefore going to change. The bad news is that if you don’t make your bed every day now, saying you’re going to make your bed every day isn’t necessarily going to make you make your bed. The only thing that does that is getting up and making your bed… and then looking around the room and noting that it really looks a lot nicer that way. Next thing you know you’re picking up your socks! Hallelujah, it’s a revolution!

But I do believe in goal setting and planning to meet that goal. (In fact that’s the problem with most resolutions, there’s no step-by-step, day-by-day.) And I believe that simple things are sometimes the most far reaching.

So what if, in your relationship with your beloved, you resolved to be kind this year. That each and every day — just start with once a day — you would do something thoughtful and sweet for one another. It doesn’t need to be big. Just offer to warm up her tea or ask him before you run upstairs if he needs anything. Do it not because you expect loads of thanks but just because you can and it’s a nice thing to do.

The fact is, that you probably will be thanked. Another fact is, you will probably like yourself better because you’re being nice and you’ll be nicer. Now I’m not talking about the ooey-gooey so sweet I have to lie down with a tooth ache kind of nice. I’m just talking about simple generosity of spirit.

Why not make a resolution together to be kinder to one another. (somehow it seems that we can always be a bit kinder.) Kindness is a wonderful gift to offer one another. And it’s contagious. Pretty soon you’ll be offering it to other people you know. Then you’ll be offering it to strangers.

Then before you know it, people all over will be being nice to you and your partner. You’ll have to change your expectations about who people are in the world. Go ahead, I dare you: have a happy new year.

Your love deserves nothing less!

Believing in you and your love,