Yesterday I wrote that part of planning your holidays and creating holiday traditions is a good way to ensure that your relationship solidifies. So here’s the first of your parlor games for your holiday couples’ party: Kissing Games… no not kissing someone else’s partner. Kissing your own. Practicing PDAs!
Set up some categories: movie kiss, shy kiss, wedding kiss, goofy kiss… and here’s an important one: the first kiss. do you remember what that was like? tell the story. Remember. what other kinds of kisses are important to have?
Icky you say? You know, it’s good to practice the romance and to acknowledge that it’s hard work. It’s good to giggle about it, and to giggle about it with other friends. So many people give up kissing when romance deepens to relationship. Kissing becomes prelude rather than a goal in itself. Remember what it was like when you first started kissing. Somehow that degenerates to Quick pecks. nice, but not a meal in themselves! No, long luxurious kisses will go a long way to making life and marriage sweeter!
Tip: call a party of your favorite couples together for a party and parlor games. hold a kissing contest. Figure out prizes. Laugh a lot. Kiss! Laugh some more. Then when your guests go home find ways to add more kissing to your relationship. It’ll do you a world of good!
Hey! What is it? Why have we forgotten that mistletoe thing? It’s your holiday wedding. Hang it everywhere. Give it out as favors. Forget that glass clinking thing. Let people hold up the mistletoe and then you kiss. Then get them back. Hold up your mistletoe and make everyone else kiss. We’ve forgotten how important kissing is. “We’re best friends.” Hey, I have a lot of really good friends. None of them can lay a smacker on me the way my Sweet Pea can. And really, I’m not interested in finding out. But kissing is a lost art. Encourage it. Let your couples remember that they felt this way and got married for a reason too. And there’s no reason why people can’t exchange perfectly appropriate kisses with other people. Parlor games included kissing games for years, even during Victorian Times.
I know, it’s hard for an unmarried person. So work harder at your guest lists! help your friends out! You’re in love, which of your great friends might like your other great friend? Seat them together!
Tip: Buy small packages of of mistletoe as favors and teach people the mistletoe rules (this is a good thing to tuck into the best man or woman speech.) People are old enough to know the rules about appropriate social behavior (and if someone is out of line, there’s nothing more discouraging than an ooh, ugh! said in a carrying kind of voice. It’s much more effective than a smack! and hand a kissing bough onthe dance floor and kissing balls all over the place. Have a good time at your wedding! Giggling at your wedding is generally considered a good thing!
You’re engaged, you’re getting married and you’re having a wedding. Often it seems like every ounce of interest and strength you have is consumed by the wedding. But while you’re planning a wedding, you also want to be planning your marriage. It’s the first of December, the first day on your Advent Calendar, what used to be the start of the holiday season before Black Friday was invented. Now is the time to consider how you want to spend, not just this holiday, but your new family holidays. It’s easy, particularly as the newly weds, to get sucked into the shuttle between the inlaws holiday planning. And certainly you’ll want to see your families. That’s what holidays are about. But what do you want and like to do during the holidays?
Tip: spend some time together figuring out what your best holiays were. and talk together about what your ideal holidays might be (is a 4 hour drive on Christmas morning really it?). And then begin to plan something that is uniquely yours. Then make it the center of your holiday planning rather than the afterthought!